Close your eyes and imagine this scene:
Your family and friends will have gathered in an ideal setting, after having received invitations which were chosen to represent your relationship perfectly. You've picked symbolic music which strikes a perfect chord. You've composed or selected words for the ceremony which best express your love and joy. You'll be carrying a bouquet of your absolute favorite flowers. Your most dearly beloved awaits before you. It's time. Everyone turns their gaze toward you. What will you be wearing? Everyone wants to see. Shall the orchestra play "Here Comes the Bride" or "Here Comes the Dress?"
Ok. Open your eyes now. Wide open, please.
What about your dress? Will you be wearing it? Or will it be wearing you? I mean sure they'll say it's beautiful, but you want them to say "That dress is so you!"
You have plenty of other stresses on your wedding day. The dress you choose should not add to that. It should help make you feel confident and relaxed, not distracted, uncomfortable and over-whelmed. Before you start shopping or cutting out pictures from bridal magazines of what you think you want, begin your dress quest by asking yourself these key questions:
"What is my personality and how does my personal style reflect it?"
- Are you conservative? Traditional? Trend setting? Relaxed? Detail oriented? Fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants? Avant-garde? Nothing will look more out of place than a dress that doesn't fit your personality, like a fussy, frilly dress on someone that people think of as relaxed and easy going.
"The wedding location is so gorgeous. How do I make the most of that?"
- If there will be an ocean breeze blowing wear light, shear, flowing fabric. Or play to the height of the cathedral or synagogue and the long aisle by wearing a dress with length and plenty of detail on the back to give people something to look at.
"What is the tone of my wedding and how can I make sure my dress fits into that?" - If you are having a casual wedding and arriving by boat to get married on a dock you probably don't want to trip over the hemline of your full length gown as you jump off the boat.
"What if I want to party like it's 1999?" - Then I would recommend wearing something that will allow taking full advantage of those swing dance lessons you took. Meaning, if your wedding will be a 'get up and boogie' kind of affair you don't want your size DD breast popping out of your strapless gown. Wear something that will allow you freedom to enjoy yourself.
"I want to show off my best features. Which one, and how?" - Pick one and run with it. If you can't decide, objectively look at photos of yourself. Better yet, ask someone who's not closely involved with you and can give an unbiased opinion, ideally a personal Style Consultant. Do you have a nice back? Long neck & pronounced collar bones? Nice gams? Tone arms? Small waist? You get the picture. Make whatever you want to highlight a focal point for the design of the dress. Be selective and keep in mind that to show too many things off will leave you wearing a strip of gum, and then what's the point of buying dress?
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Once you've gotten the preliminary groundwork done by answering all of the above, you should be better prepared to start the shopping process. This is the fun part! The following are a few important tips to help you pick out a wedding dress that is all about you and your individual personality:
The Shopping Trip: If you are buying a pre-designed dress "off the rack", look upon the initial shopping trip as a working session. Leave those that are a little too close to the situation at home during this stage. Look into hiring a style consultant that works with you to create a look that represents your personality and leaves the type of impression you want people to have. In lieu of a reputable style consultant, bring along a friend that isn't in the wedding party whose opinion you can trust.
After you've selected some options that you feel comfortable with invite your mother or maid of honor to view these during a second trip. That way you get to share the special moment when you decide on a dress with the people that are closest to you.
The Alternative: Instead of a 'ready-made' design consider working with a local independent designer or seamstress/tailor. Nothing feels better than a dress that was made to fit your body perfectly. There are a lot of advantages to this:
The Color: Avoid looking like Bride of the Dead! Just as no two bodies are built exactly alike, neither are skin tones. If you are wearing a white dress remember that there are countless shades of white and that the numerous hues are influenced by various types of fabric. Investigate and then carefully select the color of white (or whatever gown color you choose) that will make your skin appear to glow.
The Special Touch: Make your dress really personal by including a special piece of meaningful jewelry, such as your great grandmother's cameo pin, or the rhinestone brooch your mother wore on her "going away outfit" at her own wedding.
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Your wedding is undeniably your special day. Make sure it distinctively looks and feels that way from every angle, including what you wear. Along with the other details of your wedding, put an emphasis on the selection of your wedding dress. If you follow these guidelines, you should find yourself free to enjoy the ceremony & festivities -- and being able to do so without worrying about fussy or embarrassing "wardrobe malfunctions".
Here comes the bride — and look! It's you. It's really YOU!
Darcey Howard is the Chief Style Officer for LifeStyled a style consultancy that helps people find their personal sense of style and "Brand Themselves Through Their Appearance".
darcey@getlifestyled.com
www.getlifestyled.com
206.579-0189
info@healthy-bride.com - 206-755-9683